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Love

2012-01-18T14:53:00.003+09:00

Love. . .

Love is hard, except when it's easy.

I was blessed today to be able to go on a walk with my dad. We talked about life and marriage which I feel lucky to be able to be close so close to my father.

My father and I are so much a like. We butt heads a lot but there are these moments where we speak each other's love language so perfectly that make me wonder why we don't spend more time together (we're to selfish in the same ways 90% of the time, it's the truth ;) ). Today was one of those days. I'd had a hard weekend and a hard Monday. Work is great but handling patients who are so helpless are hard, dealing with economical hardship (aka enormous school debt), and missing Dylan like crazy are just a few things on my head/ heart. Being able to talk to my dad about these things and knowing he can relate with all of them ( my mom's been gone for a week) and know's how I'm feeling/ thinking since he's very similar to me, was nice.

There are moment's in life where I'm amazed by my dad and that he truly speaks to my heart. Once was when he told me how God always amazingly surprised him with provisions our of nowhere. Today he amazed me again. He talked about how love is great because we are able to enjoy the good times and easy times but love is truly working when you are able to love through the hard and difficult times. How friendships and marriages are not just fair weathered but true love is being able to love through the shit times. He talked about how marriage isn't about being comfortable but about learning and growing from each other. That if we're not learning from each other we're missing a big part of marriage.

I love hearing great knowledge from a man who has made it 40 years in a loving marriage. As I grow older my respect for my father grows. He has taught me how to love and respect my future husband. I am so lucky to have such amazing parents who love so easily and freely. I pray that I am able to be like both of them when I am older.

A CNA is more then just wiping butts

2012-01-16T13:04:00.003+09:00

I know I haven't updated this in ages but I thought that I would surprise you all with a random post.

About a month ago I started training to be a CNA II at a hospital in Portland and I love it!! It's all the good things of being a caregiver and the nurses, for the most part, actually help/ understand if you're busy. Although, I have to say, my unit is WAY better then other ones I've heard of. I'm so thankful to God that I no longer have to worry SO much about money and that if I want to make more, I can. I am also sooooo thankful that I love my job. I don't think I've done something that I love more then being a CNA. . . I know that the end goal is to be a nurse and make more money but I REALLY like being a CNA.

Today, I worked OT (overtime) and "sat" with a patient on my unit that I'd actually sat with the day before. He isn't a very old man but for many reasons he had poor health issues and because his body was failing he was starting to lose his mind. And for his safety, he was unstable on his feet, the hospital had someone sit with him. He also, because of his health issues, had a temper and didn't understand things clearly. I was warned not to be a hero and that my safety was priority.

At first he was a little hesitant and unsure of me, a new comer to his circle, and put up a bit of a fight. By lunch he didn't want me to leave his side and was begging me to help him. He was so sad, because of his delusions, he thought that everyone was out to kill him. He truly believed this. I reassured him that no one was going to do that and that I wouldn't let anyone hurt him. He trusted me and I listened to him.

He had his ups and downs. Depending on what nurse came in or when he had his meds or if he'd take his meds, etc. But for the most part he was fine, just wanted to wander and talk to someone who'd listen. All was going well till 30 minutes after his evening meds. After that he was back to square one. The night nurse had to ask him to stay in bed because each time he got up was too unsteady on his feet. I sat next to him as he dozed off mumbling, "why Melody? Why? Why'd you do it? why?".

Well, in the morning my hospital called to see if I could sit with him again and I said I would. Today was much better and he didn't think anyone was going to kill him. he'd slept most of the night. Today, he was still confused but he wasn't angry and he slept most of the day away. Apparently, he hadn't slept for 3 days prior to the night before. I was so thankful he slept and that he was doing better. He didn't think I was going to kill him either!

I love my job but I've come to realize, I'm kind of glad most of my patients are in and out within the day. My guy from the past two days was physically easy to handle but emotionally hard. I pray he is doing well tonight. I can't help but feel like he's "mine" and that I want everything with his health care to go well. As the person who cares for him the most I hate how cold and distant some nurses and doctors can be. I understand that for doctors its 1 face in hundreds that they care for but I wonder what is missing if that is the case. A doctor, nurse, and cna are to be the most sympathetic, understanding, and loving of all people. At least that is what I think.

Part of me worries about getting jaded, like many do in any profession. I pray that God sends me some patients like my guy, now and then, to remind me that just listening, patting a back, giving a hug, looking a person in the eye, and just being another human who cares is more then enough. More so, I pray that I will never forget to love each patient who walks through my hospital's doors. That each patient is my guest and that I am to serve them graciously and to the best of my ability. Even if I got off at 1130pm and have to start the next day at 7am.

Happy Halloween

2011-10-31T09:24:00.002+09:00

Happy Halloween everyone!!!!

Unemployed

2011-09-20T14:18:00.003+09:00

This entry has NOTHING to do with the picture above but I thought my mother, who is the most avid reader of my blog, would love it. It's the documentary of what Washingtonites do in the rain. Lovely.

Well, here I am unemployed again and by choice. I got my CNA2 certificate and want desperately to work in a hospital, preferably Silverton or Salem, where I can widen my work experience. I've already applied to 5 position in multiple locations. Found out I wasn't picked for 2 positions I'd applied for awhile back. I'd even gotten a call from one hospital for one of the positions. . . wondering if I answered on the questions wrong, to not get a personal interview. Booo! ;)

I hate the feeling of not generating an income. . . the employed have no idea what a luxury it is to have a job, insurance, and safety. I definitely don't take my last job for granted but I know this is a good step in the right direction, it's just scary and could be very hard. I will cast my pole many times into the lake of hospital positions out there. I will think positively and pray that the perfect position finds me and I find it.

Tattoo

2011-09-08T12:34:00.004+09:00

Hey Mom! j/k. . . well, kind of :) For all of you who don't know it already, I have a new tattoo. And. . . I love it! Here are some pics of it and some other one's to make my mom not be sad after the tattoo ones.

Here are those cute ones :)

Beach day

2011-08-30T09:29:00.005+09:00

Last weekend Dylan and I went to the coast because one of his guys was fighting at Chinook Winds. In the end the guy missed weigh ins so was ineligible to fight. But the next day we were able to go to the Oregon Coast Aquarium for the day which was great!!! Here are some pics from our weekend.

Katy Perry Concernt

2011-07-24T00:09:00.003+09:00

Last night I got to go to the Katy Perry Concert and it was AMAZING! Bubbles, foam sprayed at us, glitter and glitz fell on us, and there were fireworks too!! My friend, Becky, knows Katy and is good friends with her sister. We got tickets in the pit (the area right around the stage) and tickets to the meet and greet afterwards! Katy said she loved how my nails matched my dress! Yes, a bit silly but in all honesty, she is the best concert I've EVER gone too. . . not because her lyrics rock or her music is life revealing but SHE'S a GREAT ENTERTAINER! She road in a cotton candy cloud that took her around the auditorium (Rosegarden) which was packed. She changed clothes a million times. She had great back up dancers. The show had a story/ movie that went a long with her songs. . . kinda. It was a fun bit. I totally would recommend going. It was worth paying nothing to go to it :)

At the meet a greet they had a little photo booth that you could take your pictures and send them to yourself. Here is one of them. I'll post more later.

Hail to the V

2011-07-22T10:04:00.000+09:00

Mom, I hope you laugh at this. . . I did :)

Why does it always sound better in Chinese?

2011-07-21T00:07:00.000+09:00

Texas Folk Visit

2011-07-20T11:40:00.002+09:00

So, last month my brother's family came and visited us all in Oregon. I thought I'd post some pics of our time at the Silver Falls Park.

Happy 40th Mom and Dad

2011-07-14T02:53:00.007+09:00

I know it's a little late coming but I just wanted to say, "Happy Anniversary" to my mom and dad who celebrated their 40th June 19, 2011. I am soo thankful for them both and hope I can bless them as much as they have blessed me these past 28 years.

Blessings mom and dad!!

Elijah Laughing

2011-06-08T07:36:00.001+09:00

Here is my amazing nephew laughing!!

Becky

2011-05-24T07:37:00.002+09:00

I have this wonderful friend, Becky, who just moved up here from California. She is probably one of the most interesting, nice, and beautiful friends I have. We were at the park the other day and I took some nice portraits of her. Here they are.

The Saturday Market

2011-05-10T12:24:00.003+09:00

For all of you who don't know, this is Dylan and he's amazing. I know, not much of a blog update but he is what is newest in my life. We met online, which most of you I'm sure know. He lives in Portland currently but is moving back to Molalla, where he grew up. Actually, we both grew up on the same road, MGR.

Portrait of Me

2011-04-26T00:46:00.003+09:00

I hung out with a friend of a friend who is a photographer up here in Oregon. He had a really fun old school camera and his fancy new 5D Mark II which we played around with. Here are some photos from hanging out.

A barrel of Rabbits

2011-04-12T04:02:00.003+09:00

So, I've decided that I really suck at communicating. I speak before I think, I say things and don't remember saying it, and I speak out of emotion and not out of a steady mind. Talk about a triple whammy. (Katie, there are only 3 sentences!)

I'd always thought that I was good at communicating because I'm good at talking. Talking and communicating are sooooooooooo very different. I don't know why I thought that because in Japan I was able to communicate a lot through not talking. Hand gestures, facial expressions, and body language. But being back in America I guess I dumbed down the facts of how to truly communicate. Not really, I've always kind of sucked at this.

Part of the issues is that I'm A. Impulsive and B. I don't hear what people really are saying because I'm so quick to hear what they are saying, instead of slowly listening to the whole thing. (Sorry mom. Had to use the "A" and "B" structure.) You know, I'm one of those annoying friends who tries to finish your sentence. Well, not all the time but often enough.

I think I get this from my dad. My mom is really good at listening, my dad and I hear what we want to hear. We get offended easily over things that aren't offensive. How does one learn to hear the correct translation?

It's odd. . . in Japan I spoke a very simple Japanese and they spoke very simple Japanese or English to me. Usually, there wasn't a lot of hidden words, or mistaken explanations because everything had to be spoken so plainly. I don't think I'm fluent in English. I get lost in what I think people are saying but they aren't really. Then again a lot of my conversations in Japanese were very shallow and never really got very deep.

It's all a barrel of Rabbits. I don't know why Rabbits but when I was thinking about this issue, I thoughts, "this is all a barrel of Rabbits". Again, lost in translation.

Buy her bag and not her body

2011-04-09T04:36:00.003+09:00

My friend, Diana Mao, started Nomi Network when she was in grad school. Nomi Network is a leading non-profit organization bridging the private, public, and non-profit sectors through enterprise and education to end human trafficking. Check out their website.

Buy her bag and not her body.

http://nominetwork.org/

My heart is lost have you seen it?

2011-04-08T06:08:00.002+09:00

My heart is lost have you seen it?

It's big, soft, and full of dreams.

If you do, please tread lightly.

Don't make any sudden moves to startle it.

Speak, softly, sweetly, and with care.

My heart is lost have you seen it?

It's incomparable to the rest.

How delicate yet strong my heart is.

The beauty within and the love it wants to give.

Be patient with my heart when you find it.

My heart is lost have you seen it?

Gently sooth it, for it's likely to be scared.

Pick it up and hold it but not too tightly.

Cradle my heart with your arms.

Let it's fears disappear as you comfort it.

My heart is lost have you seen it?

It's big, soft, and full of dreams.

The Elderly Say the Darnedest Things

2011-04-06T05:26:00.003+09:00

Most of my friends and family now a days are quoting their cute little kids. Most people think of children saying the funniest things but working in an adult foster home I hear some of the funniest things.

I have one gentleman who always asks me, "when are we getting married?" and then starts saying, "My father was a drunk. Me mother was a wench. My brother was a bastard. And my sister was a Mr." Don't ask me. hahahhahha.

New Job

2011-03-24T11:12:00.002+09:00

I started my new job on Monday and so far so good. I am working at an adult foster care home. It's not a foster home for adults. The house has 5 residents and I stay over night for 4 days and basically do cooking, cleaning, and caregiving like at an assisted living facility. I love my residents. It's hard work and a lot to remember but I'm getting the hang of it. I'm sure the first couple months will be a lot to get use to but it's nice to have a steady job. I'm thankful for the stability of a good job, good bosses, the ability to have health insurance in the near future, and so much more.

yayayyayyaya for a job!!!!

Lent

2011-03-11T09:37:00.002+09:00

So I've decided to give up refined sugar ( and try to stay away from sugar substatutes in general) and anything with sugar within the first 3 ingredients. It's a lot harder then most people think. Oh, I'm doing this for lent. I've never really done lent and to be honest. . . I'm not 100% sure what the purpose of lent is. . . to imagine what Jesus went through to give his life for us? Not really comparable. . . sugar. . . life. . . hmm. . . but I thought I'd do Lent more for myself in the thought of sacrificing something to realize how thankful for all the things I have been blessed with. I have a roof over my head, an amazing family, amazing friends, food in my belly (sugar free food), and have my health. I'm am so blessed and I need to keep reminding myself that. So . . . sugar. . begone for I am a blessed lady :)

Baby Elijah

2011-03-03T14:24:00.001+09:00

I can't keep from posting pictures of my beautiful nephew.

Dance Heads. . . Everybody Dance Now

2011-02-15T14:37:00.001+09:00

Hey all of you out there who are following my blog. Check this out on YouTube and vote for it. Pass it a long so that my friend, Kir, can get paid for her amazing dance moves. And it's just pretty f-ing funny.

going home

2011-02-14T10:34:00.001+09:00

The Edmundsons have left the building

Elijah Erik Edmundson

2011-02-11T16:42:00.002+09:00

Born: 7:05pm, February 10, 2011
5 lbs 11 oz
18.5 inches
Miracle

I want to first say how amazing my sister is. . .I'm going to "geek" out on how amazing she is and how she is soooo very strong.

Today, she was induced for safety reasons and she started to labor in the morning. By 1 ish when I got there she was in pretty active labor. I was allowed to stay in until the end and I was so thankful to be a part of it as long as I was allowed.

When I walked in my sister was laying by the window and having level 3 (pain wise) contractions. She smiled up at me and I smiled down at my beautiful sister. We chit chatted but she'd had a rough night and needed sleep. And Erik was watching over her lovingly. Nothing much was happening so after an hour or so I went down to do some homework.

I went back up around 5pm and she was pacing the floor and the contractions had increased. The room's mood had changed. There was a seriousness in the room but at the same time a peace that came with the "hee hee whooo" of my mother, Erik, and Bethany as they all breathed through her pains. My eyes teared up as I watched my sister painfully lean against the bed.

I'd never thought about wanting to be in the room or needing to be there for any of the births in my family. But I am SOOO glad I got to be there this time, even if I didn't see the actual birth. Just being there to share in the process. I got to give my hair thing up for my sister, run and get a spoon for her so she could eat some ice, and I got to warm up her Penicillin drip :). I got to observe such a miraculous process.

I have to say that it was very hard to watch her in pain and later to hear her in pain. As Jasmine said, "That sounds funny".

Bethany took it sooo well. Breathing, moving, and relaxing. And she did it all drug free. Not that she didn't want it but the team who was with her today helped her get through it without it. Amen! Even as a nurse studying and learning about these things. . . I am so proud that she didn't use an epidural. And I have to say this. . . the doctor and nurse who you are with makes the difference. Bethany felt like she was at the end of her ability. At this point she was about to have Elijah but she felt so far off still. The doctor kind of encouraged her take the epidural but when he left the nurse told Beth she didn't need it. She could tell, after 20+ years, that Beth was almost there. So when the Anesthesiologist came in she said she'd be there if needed but they all gave Beth the time. And Beth did. No tears. No Epidural. All her and Erik (and my mom). Amazing.

It does frighten me though. . . my sister's pain tolerance is like . . . mountains higher then mine.

Birth, labor, pregnancy, mothers, fathers, sisters, life... it amazes me. I am in awe of it all.

Thank you Lord for this healthy new creation and thank you for watching over my sister.

I love you Bethany Faith Edmundson. You amaze me and I am so glad you're my older sister. I hope I can be as strong as you someday. May the Lord bless you and your family.

2011-02-04T02:34:00.002+09:00

Last night I dreamed that I had been working all day and that a bunch of us girls ( my sister and my friend, Camille, are the only ones i can remember) were going to a party. We were all dressed up. I had a dress on, knee high black boots, and I'd put glitter all over my face and done my eyes up. We were going to a huge party.

As we were driving a little girl ran across the street. To miss her I swerved but I ended up running over a kid's foot. We stopped the car and got out. The boy seemed okay but was just laying on his back. He was responsive. I yelled at the girl's parents to call 911. The kid on the ground sat up and grabbed his foot and checked it out. It was broken at the ankle. The ambulance came and we headed on our way.

We got to the party and it was already going. I don'r remember a lot from this part of my dream. Just clips of it. Us dancing, laughing, and drinking.

The next day I woke up in my bed. I was so sleepy but I rubbed my face and it felt weird. It was bumpy and not a glitter bumpy but my face itself was bumpy.

I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I had all these red dots all over my face and I could see the descending aorta going down my neck. And I hadn't turned the light on. IT was dark still in the bathroom but for some reason each little bump was bright red. I turned on the light and could see the bumps and I squeezed one and a bunch of liquid came shooting out of it. All the bumps were filled with some clear fluid. The glitter caused an allergic reaction on my face.

My dream cut to my Anatomy and Physiology class and the teacher was talking about something to do with the circulatory system and it had to be at the same time I got there. He was closing the blinds and turned off the lights and my face lit up. Everyone got excited but mostly thought it interesting and wondered why I glowed red dots. And my teacher said it must have something to do with my blood because you could see the major artery too.

I sat down and class proceeded.

009

2011-02-03T06:12:00.001+09:00

I know. . . what is one to do with lack of models. . .

008

2011-02-03T05:46:00.003+09:00

This week has been forever long and buys. Fell behind but here we go again. My dad's birthday was Monday. Happy Birthday Dad.

007

2011-01-29T08:30:00.003+09:00

I got into this photo today. Probably spent too much time on it but had fun retouching my face :)
I know you can't see the major differences but in high resolution you can see the hair and the blemishes I retouched. And it look soft but it's not. Photobucket did something when I uploaded it.

006

2011-01-28T18:14:00.002+09:00

Yesterday's

Untitled 005

2011-01-27T04:07:00.001+09:00

I love fog

Untitled 004

2011-01-26T10:13:00.002+09:00

My niece lost a tooth

Untitled 003

2011-01-26T09:51:00.004+09:00

My sister is going to have a baby boy and we did some tummy shots. I'm ready to meet my new nephew.

Untitled 002

2011-01-25T13:03:00.003+09:00

I know it's nothing profound but I wanted to do a photo of my much loved water bottle. I never leave home without it and if I do I feel more naked then if I've forgotten my phone. It's one with me and really it's me seeing as I'm 55% water. It's a distant cousin really ;)

I love my CamelBak.

Picture of the Day

2011-01-24T12:58:00.004+09:00

My good friend, Tara, decided to take a picture a day and now that I'm not doing photography as an occupation I thought this to be a good idea.

Drum roll please. . .

Silver Falls

2011-01-23T15:19:00.003+09:00

Today, Aubrey and I went hiking at Silver Falls. We did the North Fall's hike which is a 7.5 mile loop where you see around 5-7 falls through the whole hike and follow the glacier water while you hike. It was beautiful and the falls were all HUGE because of all the rain and the warm weather. The sun was shining yet there was fog in the air. I loved it. Here are some pics.

After the hike Aubs and I went to dinner at Happy BBQ in Salem (I recommend this place for the servers a lone). My mom had read an article about how the place had been robbed a year ago and that they didn't have the money to re start so they leased out the place to a Mexican restaurant while saving money for their own restaurant. Well, we went in and it's not the prettiest restaurant but it was very ASIAN! I loved it. The hostess (if you can call her that) was a middle aged woman, 5 footish with a very sweet voice who said we could sit where we liked. It's not a huge restaurant and it was pretty full when we got there. She told us it would just be a moment. Aubrey and I soon realized she was the only waitress too. We sat and looked over the menu. We waited and watched as the waitress frantically rushed about. I heard her say once, "I'm losing my head". She was very endearing. From the back we heard a very low, stern, and directing voice of the chef. Another middle aged woman who I think could ward off a pack of men, drink a bottle whiskey, and make amazing Bi Bim Bop at the same time. She probably was. What Aubrey remembered and liked was her VERY Korean fill accent of, "Ooooh MY GAAAWWWDDDD!" as she's running from the front to the back with food. At the end of the evening they had forgotten part of my meal but it was fine. They brought it out later and actually they'd made more for us because of the mistake. When the cook came out she said, "You Korean?" and I said yes. "You bring friend?" and I said ". . .yes?" I felt as if she thought we were a lesbian couple, "youuuu bring frrriiiieeeeenddd???" with a bit of wink. But that could just be in my head. I forget how it came that she was kissing me on the cheek and saying, "I like you happy happy" but it definitely made Aubrey's and my night. We were laughing all the way home.

I recommend Happy BBQ. You will leave with a full belly and a smile on your face. Just be willing to be patient and understanding of cultural differences :)

Dating

2011-01-21T07:02:00.002+09:00

I'm sure most of you know that I've been on my fair share of dates since Christmas time. I have to say that I hadn't realized how tiring and draining they can be. And these were all okay dates if not good ones.

One good point about all this dating is that I'm definitely past Chris. It's funny how that all works. I feel good about where I am. A bit tired from the journey and ready for a rest.

The last guy I'd been dating for a couple weeks and he's a really nice guy. We got a long well, Christian, SUPER attractive (I know I thought so but most of my friends did too ;) ), had taught english in Japan for a year, liked similar likes and disliked similar dislikes. Many things about him I appreciated; he would text and call me regularly, he usually initiated our meet ups, he was funny, etc. But there was something always missing. . . I still can't put my finger on it but I never truly felt a heart connection. There was definitely chemistry on both sides but my heart and mind just wasn't in it.

Strange, huh?

When I called to talk to him about ending our dating he said that he'd come to realize there is a difference between knowing stuff about a person and knowing a person. And to some extent I think that is the issue. I knew a lot of things about him but I didn't feel I knew him or was known by him.

It ended well. He understood my reasoning and said he understood why "I" would chose this path. I think that was a bit of a punch in the arm but I can't blame him, I was the one ending this before he seemed to have wanted it to end. Though he was a bit passive on the topic. No arguing it over. No, "just give it some time". Which I'm bummed by but glad at the same time. the bummed side of me is just being vain and egotistic but the glad side of me is relieved.

He isn't the one for me and as my parents say, "there are plenty of fish in the sea".

While I was with the last guy I took a personality test and this is what they said I was when it came to relationships.

"Loving, hopeful, open. Likely to carry on an romance from afar. You are a window shopper.

You take love as opportunities come, which can lead to a high-anxiety, but high-flying romantic life. You’re a genuinely sweet person, not saccharine at all, so it’s likely that the relationships you have had and will have will be happy ones. You’ve had a fair amount of love experience for your age, and there’ll be much more to come.

Part of why we know this is that, of all female types, you are the most prone to sudden, ferocious crushes. Your results indicate that you’re especially capable of obsessing over a guy you just met. Obviously, passion like this makes for an intense existence. It can also make for soul-destroying letdowns.

Your ideal match is someone who’ll love you back with equal fire, and someone you’ve grown to love slowly. A self-involved or pessimistic man is especially bad. Though you’re drawn to them, avoid artists at all costs."

Crazy huh??

Sunday Funday

2011-01-18T13:59:00.001+09:00

Sunday after church my friend, "Tanta Suz", and I went hiking up Angel's Rest which is over in the Gorge area. It was pretty steep but it was amazing. I feel like I'm already one step closer to "frugal fun 2011". Here are some pics from that wonderful day.

2011

2011-01-13T13:12:00.003+09:00

I wonder if anyone is checking on this blog since I haven't updated in AGES!

What is new? I'm poor as poor can be for a white bread american asian girl. Looking for a new job since I got laid off of my last job for having a hurt back. Started back to school and am in my last term of classes. I'm starting to freak out about nursing applications and feeling overwhelmed with having no money, school, and dating. Yeah, none of those really go well together.

I am also on Nyquil while I'm doing this and is making this harder so I'm going to go and sleep.

Love you all!! Happy New Year and as my friend said, "lets talk forever". My new favorite quote.

Mwhaaa.

The Night I died

2010-12-12T06:55:00.008+09:00

Last night I dreamt I was in an extremely tall building.

It was not only tall but had a round oval shape on the top.

Kind of like the Space Needle except it felt higher and larger.

At the top of this building was a work out center.

And in my dream I was on a group tour of it.

The people with me I knew but I can’t place a name or a face to them.

Just dream people.

The building began to sway and I looked around.

But everyone kept doing what they were doing.

No one noticed or thought anything of it.

However, as the building swayed and swayed and swayed.

The sways became stronger and stronger.

And all of a sudden, someone flew through the air

Panic ensued.

Then it happened.

The top broke off and I knew I was about to die.

I wondered as I hurdled towards earth if it would be painful.

Falling didn't hurt, Falling felt wonderful.

Like someone brushing a feather across my body.

Even as that question went through my mind, I knew there would be no pain.

It would be instantaneous.

And then, I died.

It was black and I couldn't see my body.

Yet I could feel a warmth spread over me.

It was warm but it was painful.

Like when you put a heating pack on your neck

It’s too hot but its soothing.

Though I knew I was dead I was somehow able to stand.

And was whisked away. Sucked into a void.

When I came out the other side I was in my parents’ house, in the library.

I could see my parents but I can’t remember if they could see me.

I looked around the room at all the familiarity.

The desk, the books, the sad plant sitting in the corner of the window.

My body became warm and I knew I was dying all over again.

And before I could look at my parents, it turned dark.

And I was sucked into the void once more.

I woke up startled and wondered if I had a stroke or a heart attack.

That I’d heard somewhere that if you fall and hit the ground that it’s really your body having a heart attack or stroke.

I freaked out a bit. It felt so real.

I remember the falling, the hitting, and the being pulled from reality.

But like most nights I quickly fell back to sleep and dreamt some more.

May our friendship last forever

2010-11-30T09:50:00.001+09:00

May our friendship last forever
by Nicholas Gordon

May our friendship last forever;

May I sail upon your sea.

May we go through life together;

May there always be a "we."

May I be your endless sky;

May you breathe my gentle air.

May you never wonder why

Each time you look for me, I'm there.

May we be for each a smile

Like the warm, life-giving sun;

Yet when we're in pain awhile,

May our suffering be one.

May we share our special days,

The happiness of one for two;

And if we must go separate ways,

Let my love remain with you.

Glass blown Ornaments

2010-11-21T10:50:00.005+09:00

My friend, Chris, is an amazing glass blower and has personally blown hundreds of glass ornaments for Christmas gifts. Please check out his Etsy page. He's pretty amazing and they make GREAT Christmas presents.

http://www.etsy.com/listing/62473212/glass-ornament

"It Is Good" by Kate Saunders

2010-11-13T12:04:00.003+09:00

My dear friend, Kate Saunders, is an amazing poet and wrote this and I fell in love with it as soon as I heard it. Hope you all enjoy it too.

It Is Good

I know you’re here,

Your gentle hands

Always lifting, supporting, pushing,

As I, a simple particle dancing through the expanse

Begin my journey to become more,

To find my place in the very framework of life.

I hear your voice

In every collision of an electron and a positron,

Performing their chaotic choreography

To envelope a family of protons and neutrons.

They all spin with your voice,

Dance with your voice,

Crash and collide with your voice.

I feel you in it all;

Your presence directing and guiding

As we find our way,

Discover our purpose,

Become more and more solid,

More and more like matter,

Creating beauty,

Composing masterpieces,

Building life,

And you are there in every way

I hear you speaking your love

As we become what we will be

As we build only to crumble away

Compose only to decay,

As we divide and multiply

And constantly change position.

In every phase and cycle I hear your words:

You say, “It is good.”

Every time, every form, every generation

Of new matter, of new life,

“It is good.”

No matter whether I may be

The most inconsequential quark

Or a majestic molecule,

I hear you say of me,

“It is good.”

R.I.P Samson

2010-11-02T02:49:00.003+09:00

Today, Samson Lewis has gone to rest with the Lord. For you who don't know who Samson is my families Boxer. My father bought him for my mother and I for Valentine's day almost 12 years ago.

Sam was one of the best dogs ever to romp on God's green earth. He was a gentle giant who loved his girls ( Natalie, Jasmine, Lily, Dahlia, and Mahala). He would let them ride on him when they were small enough and whatever way they tugged at him he'd follow. He would bark and protect his house from all that came against it; usually squires, skunks and deer.

As a Boxer, Sam was inclined towards deviousness. He loved to sneak into the bathrooms and raid the trash cans or to jump up on the counter to find newly made treats. Sam was sneaky but kind of stupid. He never learned how to cover his tracks. He was pretty honest with his doings.

I feel lucky to have had him this long. Earlier this year we had a couple scares where Sam had heart attacks and we thought he was dying. But that dog had determination. I mean, who would watch over the family, who would take care of the girls, who would chase the deer away, and who would eat all those extra tomatoes on the counter. Teddy, the little Shitzu, was too small and had bum legs. He was a good dog but mostly for warming ones lap.

Samson was a good old dog who lived a long and good life. He will be waiting for us all at the rainbow bridge with; Abby (boxer), Wanton (pug), Shotsie (keeshond), and Trinka Bear (keeshond).

The Rainbow Bridge

(inspired by Norse legend)

By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,

Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.

Where the friends of man and woman do run,

When their time on earth is over and done.

For here, between this world and the next,

Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.

On this golden land, they wait and they play,

Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.

No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,

For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.

Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,

Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

They romp through the grass, without even a care,

Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.

All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,

Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.

For just at that instant, their eyes have met;

Together again, both person and pet.

So they run to each other, these friends from long past,

The time of their parting is over at last.

The sadness they felt while they were apart,

Has turned into joy once more in each heart.

They embrace with a love that will last forever,

And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.

Grandma

2010-10-29T14:04:00.004+09:00

Last weekend I went to my Great Aunt and Uncle's to take some portraits for them. My Great Uncle just finished writing a book about his father and his stories and needed a portrait for the book's inside flap.

I'm glad I work at a assisted living facility because they also asked me to take head shots of them for when they die. As they so delicately said, "Well, when one dies and at the memorial they have a big picture of the deceased at the entry." And my aunt and uncle are not a photo family. It was the first time I took photos for at a memorial.

Luckily, they also had me take some portraits of them together for Christmas cards which was much more pleasant.

Afterwards we went back to their house and my grandma came over (she lives across the street from them). We all sat around and talked about who passed at their place and I talked about the people who passed at mine. It was very interesting to hear them talk about death so candidly but I guess at their age it is a normal topic.

It reminded me of going and seeing the movie, "Up" with my best friend and her grandma (who lives at my work). When the main character's wife passed away I was in tears. I thought the movie was so sad. . . and happy but the beginning was so sad but my friend's grandma didn't think anything of it. I think she even fell asleep a bit. :)

Since my grandma was there I thought I would take some pictures of her and me. Here are the pics from that day.

Laodicea

2010-10-25T13:52:00.003+09:00

Today at church I heard an amazing sermon on the church of Laodicea and how they lived lukewarm. It was an amazing sermon talking about how Laodicea was a wealthy city. It was known for many things like; clothing, medicine, and wealth. But the Lord tells them that they are lukewarm because of their comfort. How they are poor, blind, and naked spiritually.

It really convicted me and made me realize how lukewarm my life is and how easy it is for me to live in comfort. I don't want the "cancer of indifference" to take hold of my life. I want to live passionate and fully.

I want to live with Christ in the center of my life.

"light without sight is perpetual night"

I've decided to take a break from the ever time consuming Facebook. I could be doing so much more with my time then "staying connected" with people.

I want to change, grow, and center my life, not on myself, on God.

I want to stop living my life for my feelings but for my convictions.

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him, and he with Me.

He who overcomes, I will grant him to sit down with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne.

He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches"

Rev. 3: 20-22

Weddings

2010-10-11T14:15:00.004+09:00

Today, I photographed a wedding in the Salem area. It was raining all day till it came time for the wedding and pictures. We were sooo blessed with great weather and light for photos. Here are some pics from that wedding and another.

Joke of the week

2010-10-04T14:41:00.002+09:00

So there was this boy, Chris, who at a young age injured his eye and had to have it removed. His father being a wood worker made him a wooden eye. He sculpted it and painted it so that it would look as realistic as possible. However, growing up was still hard. All through school Chris would get teased for having an eye made of wood.

Senior year of high school Chris decided to finally go to prom. At prom he also had plucked up the courage to ask someone to dance. He had nothing to lose since he would be graduating soon and leaving high school. Well, he looked around the room and his eyes fell on Lani who happen to have a hump on her back. Lani, at the same time, too decided to ask someone dance with her for the same reasons as Chris.

She looked up and they locked eyes. Chris walked across the room and said, "would you care to dance with me?"

Lani replied, "WOULD I! WOULD I!"

He angrily said, "At least I'm not a HUNCH BACK!"

More jokes to come.

CNA

2010-10-01T06:49:00.002+09:00

I passed my CNA test!!! I am officially a CNA now! Whoohooo!!! Can't wait to take my CNA2 so I can work in hospitals!!!

"Ambition"

2010-09-24T15:06:00.005+09:00

"Ambition"

Fear hides behind my heart in the darkness

Not allowing it to fully grasp my heart or mind

In fear that fear itself will crush my hopes and dreams

But in pushing forward fear will always lag behind

Weird dream

2010-09-24T01:40:00.002+09:00

Last night I had a weird dream. I can't remember the beginning but I was in some HUGE building. . . like a high school but 10x's bigger. It also had a movie theater.

I'm not sure why but there were huge animals roaming the halls. The animals weren't mean but they were big and none of the animals were recognizable as real but they could have been prehistoric.

I don't remember the exact progression but I ran into a couple that I grew up with since I was a child. Sherrie and Dave's daughter, Kate, was a childhood friend. I ran into them at the front of a movie theater. I could see the food counters and it was pretty packed. We were talking when all of a sudden we see some person flying through the air. and we see something green and tentacle like shoot out and grab another person. Fear shot through me but so did that feeling of nails on a chalkboard.

Sherrie said, "I don't want to be near here." And started to take off up some stairs but the stairs just lead us up and then down in practically the same spot. People were rushing to get away too. We ran and I remember kicking out a plastic square of a dividing wall so we could just get to the other side. It was all rushed in my dream. I called my parents and ended up finding them and some other people from my parent's church. We all ran up and found some secluded room that seemed safe.

We stayed in that room for awhile. It had a bathroom and running water. There was a group of people in that room who were from Africa and played the bongo drums and danced. I remember the night before we left the room they started to play the drums and dance. We all joined in.

The next day we packed up all our things. I don't know how we knew the monster was gone. We never fully saw it and we never heard anyone tell us it was gone. I packed up my backpack which was abnormally large. I packed up a My Little Pony cup, some disney toys, and other childish trinkets.

I don't remember what happened right after that but it then switched to a movie theater. . . the same one that the dream started out in. I ran into my friend Aubrey who was going to see some movie I didn't want to see. As I talked to her I looked up on the wall and there was poster of a new movie coming out. On the poster was the green monster with the long tentacles that had started the fear in my dream.

Jimmy

2010-09-22T06:26:00.004+09:00

This is Jimmy, Iris' brother inlaw, who apparently will "out live" us all as Iris tells me. As the pugs brought me to Iris, Iris brought me to Jimmy. I love them all. Pugs, Iris, and Jimmy.

A month ago Jimmy gave me a beautiful bell from S. Korea. The story goes. . .

I'd planned on going to brunch with Iris and we met up a little before hand to chit chat. As we do. Jimmy came at 10:40 on the dot and walked us to the dinning room. We all ate and talked. It was a nice meal. On our way back Jimmy parted ways and headed to his place. Iris and I checked the post box and headed back to her place.

As I'm getting back to Iris' Jimmy comes up and hands me this beautiful bell (sorry for no pic). It looked like it was hanging between a gate (imagine a Japanese Tori). It was made out of some metal. . . brass maybe and it had a little hammer to ring the bell. The ring was the clearest I'd ever heard. On the bottom it had an inscription of "korea".

Jimmy told me that he'd been in the service and after WWII he'd gone back to S. Korea to pick up a group (I don't know military lingo. Sorry.) and some captain who'd stayed behind in Korea to help with trainings and other things in S. Korea. The men weren't allowed to go ashore but the Korean people came to them in little boats with trinkets to sell. He said that the bell was the only thing he bought. Jimmy told me that he wasn't sure to give it to in his older age and wondered if I wouldn't mind having it. If it didn't offend me (cute).

I was shocked and honored by this gift. It is in my window sill and when I get home I give it a little ring to remind me of my friends at the Towers and from where I was born.

Thanks Jimmy

Joy in "The Great State of Oregon"

2010-09-16T15:47:00.007+09:00

Sunday I flew down to Sacramento/ Auburn to drive with my friend, Joy Barker, back up to Oregon. She came up to visit Monday-Thursday. Here are some pictures of our time at the coast.

Cheeeeeeeeese

Twin Rocks

Joy

seaweed

Hi, Brian

I have a crab

practicing yoga

got caught in the rain

Wet

Hair Again

2010-09-06T04:25:00.002+09:00

I don't really like to style my hair just straight so I thought I'd post another one with my hair styled :)

Need for Change

2010-09-04T12:40:00.002+09:00

I love that when you need to change something about yourself. . . your hair is always there to comply.

Yachats, A Happy Post

2010-09-02T12:57:00.003+09:00

Here you go Kate. Here is your happy post. Love you.

Today, Kate and I went on an adventure in Yachats, OR. Some of you may not know where Yachats (pronounced "Yah Hots") is, well let me tell you, it's near Newport on the coast. Here are some photos from our adventure.

It was a beautiful drive over

A driving picture. . . my MO

Fishermen

Drift Inn

Crab Quesadilla and Fish/ Chips

Friends for almost 20 years. Crazy

Beautiful foggy coast

So. . . I loved this house and was about to take a picture of it when Kate said that there needed to be more pictures of me being taken. I went over to pose thinking she'd take a full shot. Nope. A nice close up :) Thanks Kate. J/k

Here's the house

More coast

Crazy "cactus" flowers

here is one blooming/ not dead

WHO KNEW!!!

"GEM of the Oregon Coast"

I know you can't tell but what they are actually swimming in is nasty polluted foamy water.

Kate

Many self portraits

The Sun

cool window house

Cool forest

Leaf Hat

Nymph House

Funny Story. . . Kate and I walked along the beach line and then crossed over the 101 to the forest reserve thingy. Well, the quickest way back was along the 101. . . so here we are hitchhiking(not really)back.

And what better way to finish a day at the beach. Tillamook Ice Cream.

"Heart We Will Forget Him"

2010-09-01T10:06:00.002+09:00

"Heart We Will Forget Him"

Heart, we will forget him,
You and I, tonight!
You must forget the warmth he gave,
I will forget the light.

When you have done pray tell me,
Then I, my thoughts, will dim.
Haste! ‘lest while you’re lagging
I may remember him!

by Emily Dickinson

Listening

2010-08-31T04:55:00.002+09:00

Yesterday, I went to a church called, "Door of Hope" in SE Portland and was amazed at what I heard from the pastor. He preached on the reasons of why we should go to church (not about being a church consumer but that we are the church), about how to commune with a body/ in relationship, and how not to. A lot was about truly loving and how it's not about "me" or "I" but about "us" and "we".

I went for a nice bike ride (1 hr and 15 min.) out to the country and listened to his sermon on "listening" which was kind of ironic because a lot of it talks about solitude and silence. He spoke on how our world is so addicted to being connected that we have no idea how to be a lone with ourselves. And even though we use these different devices; phones, email, and FB (and really blogging) yet many of us feel alone.

Below is the link to the audio's of a bunch of his sermons. Listen to them in order if you like but definitely check out the "Listening" one.

http://www.doorofhopepdx.org/teachings/audio

Frozen

2010-08-30T14:01:00.002+09:00

Last night I had the weirdest dream. I was at some group thing and we were sitting around a table. The leader was telling us that they were going to give us some type of drug that would show us our true state of mind. And explained how most people started to cry because usually people were so broken and sad that their true state was shown in crying. The drug was some type of smoke that you inhaled. The first girl they gave it too did start to cry. She weeped. I was next. I didn't cry but was paralyzed. I couldn't move at all. It's like when your mouth clenches or a muscle tightens and you can't relax. It was painful but I couldn't move. They ended up putting me in the middle of the table.

Very weird.

"even though"

2010-08-28T14:09:00.007+09:00

Almost 3 weeks later and I'm starting to feel whole again. I'm not constantly feeling like something HUGE is missing from my life.

"even though"

even though you have a lot of baggage

even though you seem to have moved on

even though you don't love me anymore

even though you broke my heart

even though

even though I cry each time I think of you

even though I feel rejected and left behind

even though I know there is better

even though I want to move on

even though, even though

i still want to hear your voice

i still want to know your life

i still want to love you

i still do

even though

A Cure for the Lonely Hearted

2010-08-24T06:27:00.003+09:00

I've come to decide that the cure for a lonely or sad heart is a 10-speed. . . (or a kayak but the blog is about my new old 10-speed).

My friend, Aubrey, recently purchased a new old 10-speed a couple weeks ago and told me how nice it was to ride around on it. I have another friend, Stephen, who bikes to work on his jazzy nice road bike. So last week I went on the search for my very own new old bike. I searched on Craig's list which is GREAT as long as you're safe about buying and selling. I came across this little gem and decided to buy it for a whopping 75$ (which compared to Aubrey's was expensive. She found a cool old huffy female road bike. 25$ ) And I'll put a bit more into it to fix a few things. For now I just need a new handle tap and a wire that connects the front gears to it's shifter on the handle bar. It will set me back around 25 bucks. So 100$ all together. I'm happy with it and love that it's old and has character. I ride around with an OLD teal helmet that I had since I was 11 years old. I took it for a short ride and it went well. I'm only sad that I bought it so late in the season.

So for all of you out there with a sad or lonely heart, here is my advice to you. Go out and buy yourself a bike. You will be exercising which is good for so many different reasons; it can release anxiety by using and stretching out your muscles, it can help you lose weight which makes you feel better about yourself, helps you produce beta-endorphins which is the feel good sensation that athletes get when they hit that peak, and for many other reasons that I haven't named.

On another random tangent, my nieces, Dahlia and Mahala are visiting for the week. I woke up this morning to Mahala crying to get out of her crib. It was a nice wake up and to see her with her arms out stretched. So cute.

Later in the day when nap time was approaching (about an hour and half away) I was sitting watching the girls play while my mom took a shower. Dahlia was playing with legos and I started to paint my toe nails. We were in the living room and Dahlia said, "I want my nails painted too." I said, "okay, well I'll go get some nail polish remover and we'll go into the kitchen and paint your nails." She said, "No, you can paint them right here." and I said, "well, we should probably do it in the kitchen. When you're older we can do it in here." She started to get teary eyed and tantrumy. while this went on Mahala just watches on as she does. I then said to Dahlia logically (she's sooooo logical even when she's tired. . I'm sure not always.), "Daaaaahlia, that's not how we act if we want something. I can't paint your nails if you aren't happy. I'm going to get the remover and you can chose to be happy or sad when I get back." She looked at me (oh, by this time she'd fallen back on the ground in a tantrum) and started to stop crying. I asked, "Do you want to be happy or sad?" Mahala chimed in "Happy!" I got up and said again, "you can chose to be happy or sad." and when I came back the tears were dried. We proceeded to go into the kitchen and paint her nails.

I have such amazing nieces but she taught me another lesson. I have a choice and I know I'm choosing to be happy. I know that it's taking me a little longer and that's okay but in the end I really am choosing to be happy. I really want my nails painted when it comes down to it. :)

The Art of Moving On

2010-08-23T13:42:00.003+09:00

Tomorrow will be 2 weeks of breaking up with Chris. It seems like sooo much more time has passed since seeing him. It's weird how sometimes life feels great and like nothing was ever gained or lost. But then there are times when I just want to call him and tell him I need him. I guess this is just proof that I'm not in a good place to see him and that I have more to let go of in my heart.

I went camping this weekend at Suttle Lake which is over near Sisters with a bunch of girlfriends. I had a great time but it was hard to go over past Detroit like I was going to visit his parents. I never went over to central Oregon much until I met Chris and then I went a bunch of times.

I miss him and even though I know this was for the best. . . I sometimes wish we could still be together. Someday my heart will catch up with my head. I will just need to wait, be patient, and be strong.

Anatomy and Physiology

2010-08-17T08:11:00.002+09:00

Finally!!!! I got an A in my Anatomy and Physiology class. Praise the Lord for endurance. I feel that even though life is hard right now this is like a nice cup of Maui Waui sherbet (I recommend this on a hard day. It will brighten your day like the colors of the sherbet. ). Speaking of. . . mmmm. . . going to go get a cup. Yay, for great surprises. Onto my CNA test at the end of September. The studying never ends but that's a good thing. Keep my mind going to mush.

Both Sides Now

2010-08-15T16:10:00.000+09:00

Young love

2010-08-13T13:49:00.004+09:00

Today, I boxed up all of Chris' mementos. Surprisingly it all fit into a shoe box and is sitting in my closet. Sad, all of him is in a shoe box in m

y closet.

I finally deleted him from my phone. He no longer is in my phone, facebook, or room. He is being deleted and disappearing from my life. It's sad really. Really sad.

9 months .

. . gone.

I thought time was flying by and a year would zoom past. I thought we would grow closer and head towards eternity. I thought. . . but I was wrong.

It's funny to remember young love. How it would grasp my heart and yank on it. How visceral it was and how my world would be turned upside down or right side up depending on where love lay.

Now when love is lost. . . it's like a little sharp pain in my heart and throat. Like someone was pulling out that missing heart piece. As if the person who I gave my love to was pulling out that piece of heart I gave him as he walks away from me.

Luckily, it gets better everyday. With less communication and less presence in my life. . . the more my heart heals.

Breaking up is hard to do. . .

2010-08-11T10:45:00.002+09:00

It's true. . . yesterday, Chris and I parted ways.

All day I swung from the right and left side of my brain. Part of me knows that it is the right thing to do. Knowing that after 2 weeks of talking through it that we've come to the right decision. But another part of me knows that I love him, so much.

I haven't completely figured out all my feeling attached to this break up but I know I've gone through 3 of the 5 Kubler-Ross steps of dealing with grief/ loss. The five steps are:

1. denial

2. anger

3. bargaining

4. depression

5. acceptance

I don't think these are necessarily the correct order. . . mine kind of when likes this:

1. acceptance

2. denial

3. anger

4. depression

I haven't gotten to bargaining and probably won't. . . Instead my 5th step is:

5. eat chips and m and m's

I think my 5th step is MUCH more therapeutic then Kubler Ross.

Our ending was "mutual" but difficult none the less. But I know that whatever happens will be good and good for both Chris and I. He's a great guy and I am very greatful to have been with him.

And now a new season of my life. . .

Iris and Homer

2010-07-22T10:12:00.003+09:00

Some of you know that I've adopted a nice woman at my work. Her name is Iris and she's one of the coolest and funniest women I know. I think part of it is that she reminds me of me in some ways. Like she speaks her mind (good or bad) and she loves pugs. She owns 2, Jacob and Leah, adorable pugs. Jacob is sitting on her lap in the picture above.

When I started to work at my job I'd heard of Iris from some people who knew I love pugs. Well, one day I met her daughter who had been out walking the 2 pugs while the residents were quarantined from a yucky virus going around. I'd told her I really loved pugs and if her mom needed me to I'd love to walk them. A month later I finally met Iris and we hit it off.

Iris is always wondering why I'd want to spend time with her. She always attributes it to her pugs but just like the pugs she's just a cute and quirky lady. Her and her husband seem to have an amazing relationship and a true love of one another.

One day Iris told me that her husband, Homer, was the love of her life and how they went everywhere they could together. When he was in the military they would write each other everyday. How she loved him so much and he loved her too. She told me that when he was dying their grandkids came in to see him and it was when he'd started to stop talking. He looked over, smiled, and said, "Aren't they beautiful" then looked at Iris and said, "but she's the most beautiful".

Homer would write her love poems and for their anniversary make her a card. She would show me the poems and say, "I just don't know what to do with them but I don't want to get rid of them. I cherish them so."

Another story she told me was when he was dying and she was sitting with him. She was sitting next to him when he said, "I just thought we'd go together." As she told me this she said, "We did everything together that it was just natural for us both to think this but I told him. ' Well, you go on a head and prepare a place for me and I will be along after.'" Okay, so I have to say I was in tears when she told me this. I can't imagine. . . I pray that my partner in this world is someone that I can't imagine not going into eternity with.

One of the poems that Homer wrote is this:

"Ode to a Dandelion"

Oh, little flower so golden bright,

Symbol of the Sun's great light,

It always seems to me a shame

that all those people curse your name.

Your eagerness to show your bloom,

Even where there is no room,

Is looked up on by some, you see,

As being just a bit "push."

But I suggest you are inspiring;

To me, your beauty never tiring;

But duck your head, here comes the mower!

Oops! To Late! Poor little flower. . .

Fr. Homer

Oh, yeah Homer was a priest for the Evangelical church. I love Iris because you'd never know by how candid she speaks. One day we were sitting there and she said, "Don't EVER get tattoos. Please don't. It's such a shame when young people get tattoos." I laughed to myself. Just smiling and nodding my head. Or when she told me that her daughter was making such a bad mistake not having children and slightly resenting that she and her husband bought a dog instead. I laugh when she talks like this because deep inside Iris is such a loving person who just loves people. And I think misses meeting new people.

She says that Jacob and Leah are who brought me into her life. Maybe but I'm glad we've met and that she's in my life. Teaching me in her own way about love, relationships, and life. I hope I can be like her when I'm 86.

Tit or tat

2010-07-01T03:32:00.002+09:00

I was listening to "world have your say" as I was driving home today. The topic was about breast feeding and wether or not to breast feed. Well, it was an interesting topic. I will leave the link to "world have your say" and you can read a bit of her article and the arguments. I'd recommend listening to the program because they bring in women around the world who view it from both sides. Here is the link below. Just click on it.

World Have your say

Wedding

2010-06-28T22:19:00.005+09:00

Last Saturday I shot a wedding in Longview, WA. Here are some previews of that wedding.

Ryan Andrew's Part 2

2010-06-07T00:44:00.002+09:00

Here is another update from my friend Ryan's blog. He blogged a story with the amazing art he does. You should check it out. Just click on the image and it will take you to his blog.

Sara Jackson Holman

2010-06-06T13:14:00.002+09:00

On Thursday I went to a concert at The Woods in Portland. I went to see Sara Jackson Holman. She is a native to Bend, Oregon but lives in Portland currently. Her music is a mix of Regina Spector and Fiona Apple (with out the weird). If you haven't heard her music I'd recommend it. You can listen to her music on her Facebook. Here is a link.

http://www.myspace.com/sarajacksonholman

Happy Mother's Day

2010-05-18T02:43:00.002+09:00

Mother's day was great. Everyone except the texas folks. Here are pictures.

Happy Mother's Day Mom

Emi doing her balancing act

Dahlia, drinking her "soda" which is really just water

Mama sporting the flamingo

toooooo cute

Mom's New Haircut

2010-05-12T14:58:00.004+09:00

My mom did it :) She cut her hair (18")!!! Doesn't she look amazing!! I think she looks great and her hair naturally curls like that. Hurray for Mom!

East Parkway

2010-05-10T14:16:00.002+09:00

My weekends with Chris are always filled with fun. He always takes me on little day trips/ walks/ hikes/ and more. I love our little walks and sites we see. It was a lovely day today. We also got great pie on Saturday. BEST pie I've had in awhile. If you're on SE Stark go to Bipartisan Cafe and get some coconut cream pie. YUMMY!!!!

Coconut Cream Pie

East Parkway

Guess who? :)

A barge

we're so cute

So. . . I'm really into hula hooping and made this hula hoop.

I love my boyfriend!

canoeing

2010-05-10T13:57:00.002+09:00

The other weekend Chris and I went canoeing with Aubrey. Here are the images from our canoeing excursion.

yay canoeing!!!!

Aubrey was a great stearer :)

It was a beautiful day and a great time in the water.

Happy Cinco de Maya

2010-05-07T13:34:00.002+09:00

Yesterday for Cinco de Mayo Aubrey, Andrea, and I went to Ixtapas for dinner. We ordered the largest (32 oz) margarita you can order!!! Strawberry :) Good times with good friends.

Lisa Hannigan - I Don't Know

2010-05-04T15:53:00.000+09:00

Chris and I both enjoy this song. I didn't like this music video at first but at the end I thought it was cute

6 months!!!

2010-05-04T12:55:00.002+09:00

Yesterday was Chris and my 6th month mark :) I know this may shock some of you out there but this is the longest "real" relationship I've been in. I mean "real" as in. . . post middle school. The longest I'd ever been in a relationship before was. . . around 5 months.

We celebrated by heading up to Mt. Hood in the morning for soup and hot chocolate. It was a beautiful morning.

Later we headed to East Burn to play Skiball. We also happened upon a trivia night which was fun. We technically didn't join but we listened in on all the questions. Chris did much better then I did.

For dinner we went to the same restaurant we'd gone to for our very first date. Biwa. We also had the same waitress we had had the first time too.

Yummy yakimono for dinner

Mmm. . strawberry dessert

Silver Falls Weekend

2010-05-02T12:08:00.005+09:00

Last weekend Chris and I went to the Falls and it was BEAUTIFUL!! He also made Calzones with Erik. Here are the pictures from that fun filled weekend.

Oh, yeah. . .Andrea and Aubs were there too :)

Morning people

South Falls

So Big

Behind the falls

Cave monster

So cute

<div style="text-align: center;">Last weekend Chris and I went to the Falls and it was BEAUTIFUL!!  He also made Calzones with Erik.  Here are the pictures from that fun filled weekend.</div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"   style="  color: rgb(102, 102, 102); white-space: pre; font-family:'Lucida Grande';font-size:10px;"><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4447.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span"  style=" white-space: pre;font-size:10px;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"  style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: -webkit-xxx-large; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span"  style=" white-space: pre;font-size:10px;"></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span"  style=" white-space: pre;font-size:10px;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"   style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: -webkit-xxx-large; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: 10px; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4451.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Oh, yeah. . .Andrea and Aubs were there too :)</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4452.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Morning people</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4454.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">South Falls</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4459.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">So Big</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4464.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Behind the falls</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4466.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Cave monster</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4469.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">So cute</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4471.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Cave monster 2</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4474.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">I was thirsty</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4475.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Strong</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4476.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Fun</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4479.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Hee heee hee</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4480.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">sweet kisses</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4484.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">So cute</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4487.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Behind the falls</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4488.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Behind the falls</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; "><a href="http://s979.photobucket.com/albums/ae275/melodylewis02/April%2025%20weekend/?action=view&current=DSCN4491.jpg" target="_blank"></a></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;">Our healthy meal after our hike</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span"    style="font-family:'Lucida Grande', serif;font-size:85%;color:#666666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 10px; white-space: pre;"> </span></span></div>

Cave monster 2

I was thirsty

Strong

Fun

Hee heee hee

sweet kisses

So cute

Behind the falls

Our healthy meal after our hike

Saturday Market, Sauvies Island, and Mt. Tabor

2010-04-27T01:38:00.004+09:00

Last weekend Chris and I had an adventurous weekend and here are the photos to prove it.

We met up on the sunny day

We then headed to breakfast. I got hot chocolate and he got coffee at this great sandwich shop called, "Bunk". It's amazing. If you're in Portland and you've never tried this place you should.

We then headed down to the Saturday Market to watch all the hippies and hipsters mingle around the "art". I did run into Lindsay Allen and her cousin, Carly, riding their push scooters about.

The only true art I saw the whole day. . . not really :)

We then headed to Sauvies Island where the Columbia river and Willamette river meet.

Apparently, there are two types of "beaches" on Sauvies Island. . . clothed beaches and clothing optional beaches. We didn't go to the latter.

We found a small lake. . . there were sooooooo many people out fishing here.

We then found a big lake.

Stick in the nose

After walking around the island we decided to head to a sandwich shop again :)

He's so cute

And super silly

And last we headed to Mt. Tabor.

Water

The water in these cisterns is glacier water which is then sent out to the houses of Portland.

Walking around the mountain.

Edith Widder: Glowing life in an underwater world

2010-04-23T06:21:00.000+09:00

I've becoming addicted to this podcast/ foundation called TED. To explain better here is the blip about it on Wikipedia.

"TED (short for Technology, Entertainment, Design) is a U.S. private non-profit foundation^[1] that is best known for its conferences, now held in Europe and Asia as well as the U.S., devoted to what it calls "ideas worth spreading".^[2] Its lectures or TED Talks, widely disseminated on the Internet, are subject to an eighteen minute time limit.

TED was founded in 1984; the first conference happened in 1990. TED's early emphasis, consistent with a Silicon Valley center of gravity, was largely technology and design. Its co-founder was Richard Saul Wurman, credited with having coined in 1976 the term information architect. As popularity of the talks has spread, so has the range of subject matter, to cover almost all aspects of science and culture. Those who have given TED talks include Bill Clinton, Al Gore, Gordon Brown, Richard Dawkins, Bill Gates, the founders of Google, the evangelist Billy Graham and various Nobel Prize winners.^[3]

TED's curator is the British former computer journalist and magazine publisher Chris Anderson. It is owned by the Sapling Foundation.

From 2005 to 2009, three $100,000 TED Prizes were awarded annually to help its winners realise a chosen "wish to change the world". Starting in 2010, however, only one winner has been selected to ensure that TED can maximize its efforts of achieving the winner's wish. Each winner unveils their wish at the main annual conference – within the specified 18 minutes."

Here is the most recent one I've watched

Coconut Cream Pie

2010-04-19T15:07:00.003+09:00

Friday, I decided to try and make a Coconut Cream Pie. . . to be honest. . . it didn't turn out the best. I did a few things wrong. But it still turned out okay. I know what to do next time.

Here are some pics of my baking

Making the home made whip cream

The crust. I tried 1/2 a recipe that I'd used before but the crust turned out salty in the end. I'm going to just make the normal size crust recipe next time. It wasn't TOOOO salt but just a bit salt.

The cream part of it. I used non sweetened coconut shavings. The only thing was that the shavings were huge. Next time I need to cut them up a bit smaller.

The end result was good but NOT the best. . . I'm wondering how to make the inside a bit less think. . maybe I'll cook it less over the oven. Also I won't add any vanilla. I used coconut milk and it sweetened it enough.

I am search for the perfect coconut pie recipe.

The Future of Food

2010-04-18T10:55:00.002+09:00

Please watch this video. I have left the link to it bellow. It will change how you think about food and I think it's just important to know what our government is doing or not doing with the production of genetically altered food.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/67878/the-future-of-food

Glee

2010-04-10T06:46:00.002+09:00

Okay. . . I've only watched this show . . . maybe once. BUT I saw this on someone's facebook and read what it says over the Asian girl's title, "The Asian One". . . what does this mean?????? Are we a click of some sort? Weird.

Oldest Niece

2010-04-08T14:43:00.002+09:00

I was looking at pictures on my sister in-law's FB and I ran across this picture of Natalie, who is the oldest grand daughter in the family. She is currently 8 yrs old, and when I look at this picture I feel like the essence/ spirit of innocents is in her eyes. She was such an adorable little girl with such a silly personality. Her little voice . . . I can still hear what it sounds like. My dad bought my mom a picture frame where you can record things on it to play when you press a button. At first it was him telling her something sweet but it soon was recorded over with grand babies voices. And the last one I heard was Natalie saying, "Nana! Nana! Come! Come Nana! Come. . ." It was SOOOOOO cute. I think, since Natalie is the oldest, when I look at old pictures of her I feel like a lot of time has passed by because she has changed and grown so very much. I mean. . . I remember when she was born! She has been the ONLY niece of mine that I was there when she was first born. I was out of state with the rest of the nieces when they came along.

Even though she's growing up, becoming tooo cool for certain things, and making her own opinion on things. . . she'll always be this little "monkey" to me. She'll always be that silly, goofy, crazy girl who can make herself laugh sooo hard that she turns purple. Also the little girl who carries her cat around by the waste. And even though I know if she had the choice to have dinner with either Hannah Montana or myself, she'd pick HM without blinking. I still love her to pieces.

I guess that's love . . . and the closest thing I can relate to parental love. She was the first to evoke that unconditional, for no prior reason being, etc kind of love. The first time I saw her and held her I knew I would die for her.

Easter

2010-04-07T06:45:00.002+09:00

Happy Easter!

On Sunday Chris and I went to the Episcopalian church, Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, downtown on Everett and 19th. It was a nice service and a beautiful church. I had never been in an Episcopalian church and enjoyed my first experience.

After we went to see his sister and wished her a happy Easter and then headed up to Longview to my sister's.

Here are some images from that day.

I made all my nieces circular scarves for Easter

Except for Mahala who is a bit too young for a scarf. . but she got fruit leathers.

Dahlia and Jasmine in their ballet outfits.

Dahlia told me she had a tummy ache. Silly girl

Uncle Jas and Auntie Anna with Mahala

Me and Dad

Fooooooooood

Unsure about sitting next to Chris. . hhahaha.

Silly boy

EGGGGGG HUNTTTTTTTT!!!!!

Happy Birthday Mahala

2010-04-06T05:33:00.002+09:00

Mahala is 1st birthday. I can't believe how fast the time flew. Here is her Curious George birthday party.

Dad being Japanese. . . Glen being weirded out by dad :)

cutest cupcakes ever

my monkey

yay

opening presents

more presents

and more.

On our way back to P-town

Cooking With Kate

2010-04-05T15:14:00.002+09:00

A couple weeks ago I went over to my friend Kate's house and she made me a breakfast lunch meal. From scratch. I love home made meals and this one was GREAT. It was sausage (chicken) and hash browns. Really easy and so good.

here are the pics. . .

Kate prepping the ingredients

Mixing it all up

grading the hash browns

cooking

the meal.. yummmmmmm.

Thanks Kate

My Mom's Hair

2010-04-03T11:31:00.004+09:00

If you know my mom, you know that she has REALLY long hair. Recently she has started to look for a new hair style. . . a shorter one. Here are two hair styles that she liked. Which do you like better for my mom?

B

Please let me know. Thanks.

I HATE April Fool's Day

2010-04-02T14:34:00.003+09:00

I've never really thought much about April Fool's Day. I didn't like it or dislike it until March 31, 2010 when my friend, Joy Barker, posted on her blog this. . .

... when I read this I was soooooo shocked and couldn't believe my eyes!!! I wasn't even thinking about this stupid holiday, that isn't really even a holiday, coming up the following day. I immediately called my mom, when my parents came to Japan we stayed at Joy's and Brian's place, to tell her to go check Joy's blog. Well, my mom's computer wasn't working so I just told her what it said and described the image. My mom said, "oh, I'm going to go out and buy a baby thingy and send them a package." I said, "oh, wait to send it tomorrow because I want to get a card for them too." We talked a bit more and I hung up. Later that night Chris and I went to the store so I could get a card. Well, come to find out later that night when I got home that it was an April Fool's joke. I was about to show my mom the blog when I read an email I'd gotten from Joy, laughing at me for believing this April Fool's joke.

So, that is how I came to HATE April Fool's Day.

I am now currently praying that Joy gets pregnant. I will pray this everyday till it comes into fruition. Mwhwhahhahahhahahhaha. . . and this is how I will seek revenge on Joy Barker.

Luv ya Joy

Back to School

2010-03-31T14:30:00.001+09:00

Monday kicked off the Spring term at Chemeketa Community College. . . I am a student again. Can you believe that??

Monday night I had my first CNA class which was fun but long. My CNA classes are 5 hours long from 4-9pm and on Monday it was 3-9 because of orientation. I was pooped at the end.

Today, was my first Chemistry lec, rec, and lab. Like the CNA classes it is fun but long. I was worried about Chemistry and still think it will be very hard/ lots of work but I think I'll enjoy it. The CNA class tonight was interesting but I was tired by 9pm. We learned how to dress and undress a patient/ resident. We also learned about ethics.

In the CNA class we also watched two short videos my instructor enjoys.

Here is the first

and this one

dream interpretation

2010-03-26T15:27:00.002+09:00

So I looked up what dreaming of "orcas" can generally mean:

*deep unconscious / deep spiritual feelings

and

*To dream of an orca, also known as a killer whale, shows the dreamer is not sure of the motives of his/her protector. The 'killer' whale then represents distrust and must be viewed in that light by the dreamer

mmm. . .

Killer Whales

2010-03-25T12:32:00.003+09:00

Last night I had the weirdest dream. I was in some community of sorts and we were all fleeing where we lived. Or more so. . . we were being evacuated. It's the whole idea of Jurassic Park where the helicopters come down and all the people have lived this horrible nightmarish few days. In my dream the area we were in was collapsing and was unstable. We were told to be at a certain place at a certain time to be picked up. And if we weren't there then we could get left behind. I was underground somewhere. . . maybe an aquarium because there was this long dank hallway I had to run through that on the right side was all aquarium glass and there were a bunch of Killer whales that kept ramming against the glass at me. I was scared to run through the hall but in the end I did and I keep picturing these Killer whales trying to get at me.

Last weekend I had a dream where my dog, Sam, got eaten by a Killer whale too. The dream was longer then just that part but the part that had to do with the Killer whale began with me watering an area of lawn with a garden hose. I had laid it on the ground and the water began to pool up. It was so clear, like glacier water. Part of the lawn made a tiny island to the side of the pool of water. It was large enough for me to jump onto but not large enough for another person. A friend and I came back and it had made a deep pool somehow. Part of the water was covered by a tarp and so I jumped over to the island to uncover it. Underneath was a huge Killer whale. Sam my dog jumped into the water and it seemed was trying to swim to me but he wouldn't get out. I jumped in the water but he wouldn't come out. I got out because the whale swam towards us and then grabbed Sam by the leg and drug him down. He then began to eat Sam.

I think this is a bit odd. . . A few years ago I had a few Killer whale dreams too but in these dreams the Killer whales were all docile and didn't harm anyone. I almost felt a peace with these dreams but with my most recent dreams I wake up startled and unsettled.

Weird.

Stonehenge Maryhill, WA

2010-03-23T06:10:00.002+09:00

On Saturday Chris and I went to Maryhill, WA to see Stonehenge. It was a beautiful day. Here are some photos from our trip

We stopped in Hood River (which I LOVED)

Stonehenge

the gorge

Soooooo big

windmills

more windmills

the gorge

Us

So pretty

Inside the Maryhill Museum

A chess collection in the museum

Mount Hood

The Melody Lewis

2010-03-18T17:12:00.002+09:00

The other day I was at Mcmenamins with Chris and I ordered my usual drink, a diet coke with a splash of lemonade. I didn't know what the name was so I asked the waiter and he didn't know. Later a woman came with our drinks and she asked me, "did you order this?"

"yes, I did" I replied

"Do you know the name for it?" she asked me.

I said, "no, do you?"

She didn't know the name for it but her friend's boyfriend apparently always orders it and that they want to call it the Michael Jordan. YUCK!!!!!!!! I said. . . maybe the Michael Jackson.

Well, I've decided that it should be called the "Melody Lewis". I don't know anyone else who drinks it and why not :)

SOOOOO . . . if you ever feel like trying it out. . . just ask for the "Melody Lewis" and when the waiter or waitress doesn't know what that is just let them know it's a coke or diet coke with a splash of lemonade. Not 1/4 of lemonade but just a splash.

I hope you enjoy this drink and spread the name around :)

GRANT

2010-03-17T07:31:00.001+09:00

I know you've all been wondering if I've gotten my grant for the CNA program. . . well . . . I have!!!!!!!!!!! I am soooo blessed by this grant. It means I will have EVERYTHING paid for!!!! My scrubs, shots, books, tuition, gas, etc all paid for. THANK GOD!!!!

Real Update

2010-03-13T10:03:00.002+09:00

I realized that most of you guys out there have no REAL idea of what I'm doing. I mean besides my adventures with Chris.

Recently, I've gotten accepted into a CNA program and am waiting patiently (Sp?) to see if I got my grant that will pay for it all and a bit more. The long term goal is to become a nurse but since I can't apply to the nursing program till this fall I will try to get my CNA (certified nursing assistant) certification so I can work and see if this is for me. I have some prerequisites I have to finish before applying to the nursing program too. I have about 1 class a term. I did get into the Chemistry class needed to get into the anatomy/ physiology series required for the nursing program. So, Yay.

I know you're wondering if I've given up on photography but I haven't. I have 2 weddings booked this summer which isn't much but it's a start.

To be honest I feel like life is finally moving. Since moving back from Japan I've felt like I was flailing. I tried photography but the debt of my student loans were crushing me. I've gotten past that really and am just figuring out what is best for me. I love photography and know it will always be a part of my life but I've come to realize there are dreams inside me that are much bigger then being a photographer. For example; marriage, family, being debt free, etc.

So far the doors seem to be opening with the nursing.

I am especially thankful for my parents for all their help, support, and love. I don't know what I would have done without them. The Lord really blessed me with amazingly understanding, patient, and encouraging parents. Thanks.

Also thanks to my friends who have been praying for me and supporting me in this shitty time. yes, I said shitty. . as my mom said, "some times there is only one word you can use to describe something." And so there you have it.

Love you all.

The Beach

2010-03-09T14:50:00.004+09:00

On Saturday Chris and I headed to the coast. It was SO beautiful! I love the coast. . . especially with Chris. We started in Tillamook where we saw a big tree and a light house. Headed up to Rockaway beach and then down to Pacific City for the sun set and dinner.

the big spruce

Raaaarrrrrrrr

crouching

Chris with the tree

sooooo big

big roots

da ocean

The light house.

the wind is blowing. . . and so is Chris

Tillamook Cheese FACTORY!

umpa lumpas

ice cream

more umpa lumpas

Ice cream

He's sooooo cute

the beach

hee hee hee

snuggling

the kite

the water warm

Air museum near the tillamook cheese factory

it was HUGE

he's getting eaten

a big engine

the sunset at Pacific city

another one without my shadow

Haystack rock. . . beautiful

Lisa Goe

2010-03-02T11:34:00.001+09:00

My friend, Lisa Goe, was featured/ helped in making a super cool music video. She shared it on her site but I thought I'd post it on mine as well.

Here is what she had to say on her blog:

"yep..I did a background vocal part for some friends of mine, the Pseudo Rebels. You may be familiar with their remix of Kid Kuddie's song "Day and Night". For the music video we all went to the apple store at a certain time, and silently set up our "gear" at 2:17 or other. we all pressed record and made this amazing music video! Mind you we did get kicked out..but now its actually featured on apple.com.. hahah! how awesome is that!

Enjoy!"

Aflac

2010-03-01T16:20:00.002+09:00

I recently started to work for Aflac which is great but hard. I haven't decided 100% if it's for me or not. I do however have a lot of time to see if it is. Selling insurance is definitely hard and I did think it would be a little different. I thought it was more like. . . they had businesses already lined up for me to go to. . . but it's mostly cold calling.

One thing I like is that I do like the company and product. I think both are basically good. I also like the potential of making good money.

What I don't like is that I don't know how much I'll make day to day. . . they say that if you put in the time that it will (statistically speaking) pay off. I started work February 16 . . . and haven't made any money yet. I know it will take awhile and I keep reminding me that I can do it but it will take time. I think mental fatigue is my biggest weakness.

Come March 29th I will be enrolled (if all goes well) in a Chemistry class needed before entering nursing school at Chemeketa and a CNA program in the evenings. I'm really excited about both.

I also have my first wedding scheduled for this summer!!! yayayyayay!!!! I love wedding photography.

I shink so

Love

A CNA is more then just wiping butts

Happy Halloween

Unemployed

Tattoo

Beach day

Katy Perry Concernt

Hail to the V

Why does it always sound better in Chinese?

Texas Folk Visit

Happy 40th Mom and Dad

Elijah Laughing

Becky

The Saturday Market

Portrait of Me

A barrel of Rabbits

Buy her bag and not her body

My heart is lost have you seen it?

The Elderly Say the Darnedest Things

New Job

Lent

Baby Elijah

Dance Heads. . . Everybody Dance Now

going home

Elijah Erik Edmundson

009

008

007

006

Untitled 005

Untitled 004

Untitled 003

Untitled 002

Picture of the Day

Silver Falls

Dating

Sunday Funday

2011

The Night I died

May our friendship last forever

May our friendship last forever by Nicholas Gordon

Glass blown Ornaments

"It Is Good" by Kate Saunders

R.I.P Samson

Grandma

Laodicea

Weddings

Joke of the week

CNA

"Ambition"

Weird dream

Jimmy

Joy in "The Great State of Oregon"

Hair Again

Need for Change

Yachats, A Happy Post

"Heart We Will Forget Him"

Listening

Frozen

"even though"

A Cure for the Lonely Hearted

The Art of Moving On

Anatomy and Physiology

Both Sides Now

Young love

Breaking up is hard to do. . .

Iris and Homer

Tit or tat

Wedding

Ryan Andrew's Part 2

Sara Jackson Holman

Happy Mother's Day

Mom's New Haircut

East Parkway

canoeing

Happy Cinco de Maya

Lisa Hannigan - I Don't Know

6 months!!!

Silver Falls Weekend

May our friendship last forever
by Nicholas Gordon